Sunday, February 10, 2008

Honking only makes it worse later

I am sometimes a driver and sometimes a pedestrian. And I always think that both groups are a bunch of f*ckwits.

Everyone knows that drivers aim for pedestrians, while pedestrians intentionally stroll s-l-o-w-e-r in crosswalks. Whatever, it's life.

But jerkiness always catches up with you.

Today for example.

I was on Huntington Street - which, as a driver and occasionally as a pedestrian I HATE. I try to avoid being on it as much as I can. It's bumpy, poorly marked, and badly signed. And once I was walking down the far end and narrowly missed a torrent of vomit from an upper floor window. Yeah, as much as I can, I stay away.

Except for today. I got stuck in the wrong lane and had to drive down Huntington instead of cutting up and over Heath Street like I often do.

One reason I hate driving down Huntington is the trolleys. I am just no good at sharing the road with trolleys. I don't know why and I don't really care - I just don't like it.

So I am behind two cars and the trolley comes to a stop at an intersection where it's green light.

Which means the first driver has to stop even though it's a green light - trolley's are like the school bus, there is a little stop sign that is attached to the trolley door so when it opens, the trolley lights flash and there is this stop sign.

Now, to me that means that even though the light is green, us drivers have to stop so that the passengers can walk from the stop to the trolley without getting mowed down.

However if you are a Masshole driver it means laying on your horn and yelling out the window to the car in front of you "to what the f*ck a**hole? MOVE!" because you are too much of a tardo to see the stop sign on the trolley.

This guy is literally leaning out the window, screaming at the driver of the first car. I of course had my window cracked to hear every sweet word of invective this moron was letting loose.

And then had a good chuckle because just ahead of the first car, just past the intersection, was a cop car. And as we all started moving again, guess who was getting pulled over?

Yep, the screaming loony toon with the vocabulary of a drunken French sailor!

Because I am pretty sure road rage is a no-no.

Ha! Bad boys, bad boys, whatchoo gonna do....

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