Thursday, March 31, 2011

I think there is another, simpler, word for this.

One reason, among several, why I no longer possess the will to continue the "whole online dating thing" is polyamory.

Poly-huh-wha? you are probably thinking. Yeah, you don't want to know. Oh, well, maybe you do. I wish I didn't.

According to the fount of all knowledge online*, Wikipedia, polyamory is:

the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. Polyamory, often abbreviated to poly, is sometimes described as consensual, ethical, or responsible non-monogamy. 

However most people (men, in my case), aren't always upfront about this aspect of their life. Which is totally annoying.

There is nothing weirder in my life than meeting a guy out for a drink who then asks me if I am interested in meeting his wife because they are looking to bring a third person into their relationship.

No thank you.

Because you know what:

A) That sounds a little Big Love-ish to me. And yeah, I know there is a difference between polyamory and polygamy, but when the couple in question is already married.... it gets confusing.

B) No part of my dating profile indicated that I was open to it. In fact I pretty much stated that I am monogamous, completely & all the time. I am half Old World French which means that it is a given that should I stab you in a jealous rage over another woman, it's nothing more than a crime of passion and really, those cannot be helped sometimes. Eh, tant pis.

C) It has never not sounded creepy to me when a guy tells me what his wife/partner is looking for, from me. Well, how about you re-read B.

Let me just say one thing here: I don't care who and how many people you are in a non-monogamous intimate relationship with, it just isn't happening with me. But if that is your thing, good luck.

Also I think that most poly folk are not looking online for another partner, it's just that the internet has sort of morphed into this weird online candy store of relationships. Maybe it was always like that. But stuff that normally people wouldn't do in real life, they will try out online. That would explain avatars I guess.

So I am giving the online thing a rest. I am done with Mr. Goodbar looking for Almond Joy. My and my, uh, Peanut Butter Cups are going to give it a try out in the non-online world.

Wish me luck.

Oh and if all the poly, married, engaged, involved, etc, folk could somehow mark themselves with a big X for my reference, that would be GREAT. Thanks!**

**Also sarcasm

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