Thursday, July 23, 2009

Summer refund

I know that talking about The Weather is, uh, passe, but I just want to say that I want a mulligan.


I barely even have a farmer's tan. Being excited on account of two consecutive days without rain is depressing.

I want it hot HOT. I want to stick to car seats. I want to go for a swim at the beach. I want ice cream to melt down the side of the cone. I want heat and strong sunlight and dry ground and sand flicking off the back of my flip-flips.

Things are dire when you can't find your sunglasses, but aren't too pushed to get a new pair...

Y'know what I mean?

At the least it could be raining Diet Coke....

Monday, July 13, 2009

When Scrabble smarts collide....

it, well, it just smarts...

Me n' the other half of Team SmartiePants failed to notice the following error:

Let me just say that yes, I DO actually know how to spell u-n-s-a-l-t-e-d correctly.

It's just that I was giddy at being able to use ALL my letters in one go. Not only that, if I HAD spelled "unsatled" correctly I would have hit both double word scores.

Double word score + double word score + 50 point bonus = a bajillion points!

But I don't feel so terrible because 1) neither of us copped on to this error until well into the game (yep, stupidity loves company), and b) we both got a turn to lay down all our tiles.


Thursday, July 09, 2009

Sign ' the Times - Part Two

So I guess what they meant when they said coming soon....

Is that a whole brand new building was literally going to be coming soon.


'Membah when it was Nash's

And yeah, tonight, it was a beautiful night.

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

On being sick

In my universe there are four levels of sick:

Level One: is sick and tired. Happens occasionally. Usually around day 21. Whatevs.

Level Two: is the Screwyou Flu. This dreadful malady hits you the Friday before a long weekend, or slightly less obviously, the Tuesday after a long weekend. I typically get this flu when I've gone too long without a random holiday. Signs of this illness include getting all my work completely done before the end of the day, skipping lunch, and using extra tissues.

Level Three: Allergies. I get them all the time - spring (blooms), summer (heat & dust), fall (leaves), winter (indoors too long). I am also allergic to cats and gods and unloading the dishwasher and filling the gas tank. Anytime I sniffle or cough, it's an allergy.

Level Four: Food poisoning. I cook, I don't follow direction, I will eat cheese that I accidentally left out all night, and I regularly eat stuff a littletinyweenyittybittybit past the expiration date. Oops it's the poops that get me every time! And since I write about food related things I write about this level of sick with alarming frequency (yep I checked). Oddly enough I am therefore totally paranoid about cooking for others, which is why I turn into Baba Yaga at Thankgiving. Yaga, not WaWa. The rule of Level Four is that I only poison myself.

Level Five: SICK. This is when allergies can't be cured with Claritin, or Emergen-c, or garlic, or pho, or spicy food. This is when a virus or bacteria invades your system and there is nothing you can do about it but smash it to bits with severe antibiotics (if it's bacteria that is). Oh and lots of fluids and bedrest. I hardly ever really get to this level. Usually I can garlic, C, or pho my way out of it.

So that is where I am right now, Level Five. And it totally sucks. I am a dreadful patient. I am impatient and it's hard for me to lie in bed all day. I thought I would be a productive sick person and do laundry, but the kibosh was put on that plan because I couldn't even get the laundry together without feeling dizzy and winded.

For the past couple of days I've had a dreadful cough and a sore throat. I haven't been able to eat much because the coughing makes me want to puke. And I can only really eat soft foods because of the throat. Plus I have been drinking about an ocean of water which is good for my skin, but bad because I keep having to go pee and if I don't go right away and I start the uncontrollable coughing, I wet myself a tiny bit. Which is why I was going to do laundry today, since I am quickly running out of underpants.


I f*cking HATE being sick.

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Wait. Did you get the same call today too?

From the Fireman's Local 718 (617-288-2100) around 1pm today telling you that your local firehouse was closed today by the Menino administration and that you should call the Mayah (617-635-4500) and complain? Because the Mayah was putting YOUR life and the life of YOUR family in danger?

What kind of sh*t is that?

I would like to be put on the do not call list for dumbass Boston petty politic bullcrap. Thanks.

Oh and PS: the local firehouse wasn't closed today.

Oh and PPS: I am not necessarily knee-jerk anti-union, but I am against dumbasses who have lost the point. Yeah, complain about the money going into your pocket, but where was all this effort when you wanted to get new mechanics to check brake lines and equipment function and all that sort of thing?

Oh and PPSS: And when I say dumbasses, I mean union officials. Because most of the ordinary firefighters I've met, do it because they like to fight fires and stuff. Not because of the money. I would love the money too, but there is no way I would ever want to do that job.

Oh and PPPSSS: I am done now.

Oh my god make it stop!

So you know when you check something online at work, only you really shouldn't be online, and the office is super quiet and everyone is diligently working super hard?

Yeah that time.

I find it completely annoying that the entire website is silent EXCEPT for the weather page. Well I don't know if the entire site is silent, but the pages I check out are EXCEPT for the frickin' weather page. WTF? Sound should be optional.

Whenever I click on the Weather page, there those frickin' meteorologists are yapping about "precip" and "stalled low pressure systems" and stuff. And for some reason it is always totally loud. It is basically my computers way of saying: HEY EVERYONE, SHE'S SURFING THE NET OVER HERE WHILE YOU CHUMPS ARE ALL HARD AT WORK! SUCKAS! because I can't find the mute or pause button fast enough.

Sometimes I hate my computer. And I always hate the weather page.

Sunday, July 05, 2009

A few wobbly shots...

Skyyyyyyyyyyyy rockets in flight!

July 4th, 2009

For the past few years we've gone over to my Grandad's apartment by the Pru to watch the fireworks. And so this year, even though Grandad is still at the rehab center, we went anyway.

In my opinion, the fireworks should come on at 10. And Keith Lockhart is a pompous git.

But what I DO love is the flyover:

And the fireworks. Especially when they are so loud your sternum vibrates and all around the city car alarms are going whooopwhooopwhooop banbanban beeeboobeeebooo:

(as seen from the balcony on the 24th floor!)

I am glad to be an American. For all the f*cked up crazy sh*t that makes up this wacky nation, I would not trade my citizenship for anywhere else.

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of other great places to live, but not for me thanks.